An Ordinary Life

Mother of 3
Critical Care Nurse
Liberal Thinker


October is one of my favorite months.

October has high school football and my kid plays some hellacious high school football.

October has Halloween and Halloween is my favorite holiday.

October is warm days and cool, occasionally chilly, nights.

It’s almost sweater weather!

It’s almost time to bring out the fire pit and sit outside at night and make s’mores and drink beer (wine for me!).

October has my dad’s birthday. He would have been 90 this year. I still miss him.

Unfunny Co-workers

There’s some sort of employee fair at work with a poster contest among the departments. Everyone is “encouraged” to participate. Somebody from day shift put my name down as the VOLUNTEER for making this poster.
If you aren’t willing to do the crap work yourself, don’t screw over somebody else. Life will not be pleasant when I find out who did it.


A Response to ‘Women Against Feminism.’

Imagine this:

The year is 2014. You are a white Western woman. You wake up in the morning in a comfortably sized house or flat. You have a full or part-time job that enables you to pay your rent or mortgage. You have been to school and maybe even college or university as well. You can read and write and count. You own a car or have a driver’s licence. You have enough money in your own bank account to feed and clothe yourself. You have access to the Internet. You can vote. You have a boyfriend or girlfriend of your choosing, who you can also marry if you want to, and raise a family with. You walk down the street wearing whatever you feel like wearing. You can go to bars and clubs and sleep with whomever you want.

Your world is full of freedom and possibility.

Then you pick up a newspaper or go online. You read about angry women ranting about sexism and inequality. You see phrases like ‘rape-culture’ and ‘slut-shaming.’ You furrow your brow and think to yourself: ‘What are they so angry about? There is no such thing as sexism anymore.’

Now imagine this:

The year is 2013. You are a 25 year-old Pakistani woman. A few months ago, you married the man you love. A man you choose for yourself. You are also pregnant with his child. You see your life stretching out before you, filled with hope and happiness. Suddenly, you and your husband are dragged away from each other. You are both beaten with bricks and batons. You can’t fight back. You can’t escape. No one comes to help you. Through your fading vision, you look up, and look into the eyes of one of your assailants: into the eyes of your father.

The year is 2013. You are a 23 year-old Indian woman. You are a physiotherapy student with a promising career ahead of you. You are sitting on a private bus travelling home alone on a warm December evening. You gaze out of the window as the buildings of New Dheli rush past you and feel content. Suddenly, a blunt force hits the back of your head and you fall to the floor of the bus. A group of strange men are standing over you. They bring the metal bar down on you again and again and again until all you can taste is the blood filling up your mouth. You pray that you will die soon. And you do, but not then. You are raped, beaten, and tortured over and over again. Death is slow and agonising.

The year is 2014. You are a 13 year-old girl from Niger. You no longer live there though. You are now living in the neighbouring country Nigeria, sitting alone in small room on a small bed in a small apartment high above the city of Kano. You are not allowed to leave. Your stomach is swollen from the unwanted life growing inside of it. You had no choice. The father is a man in his 40s. He is a businessman. He has bought you as his wife. You were a penniless, uneducated girl when he came for you. You don’t know of any life you could have had. Neither did your family: just one less mouth for them to feed. You still have the body of a child, and it’s straining under the pressure from the one inside of you. You feel like you’re about to be split in two. You don’t wonder if you will survive the birth. A part of you doesn’t want to.

These are fictionalised accounts of real events that have happened to real women living in our world today. They follow the past 250 years of women and men campaigning for women to be given equal rights to men to prevent these kinds of injustices and abuses on the grounds of gender taking place. Over the course of this time, campaigners – Feminists, both female and male – have been locked up, beaten, tortured, and even killed, in the pursuit of equality. They did this with pen and ink and print; they did this with their voices; they did this with their bodies; they did this with art and music; they did in courts of law and halls and houses of government that they fought be to allowed into.

They did this so that women would no longer been seen as property, livestock, breeding machines, sex objects, punching bags, or infantile morons. They did this not just for themselves, but also for their daughters, and their daughters, and their daughters for generations to come. They did this for women they would never meet – women who lived across countries, across vast oceans, across the entire globe, and even across time.

They did this so that women like me – a white Western woman – could attend school and university; to learn to read, write, and think critically; to gain a degree; to get a job and be paid an equal salary to a man in the same position; and to sit here with my own computer and type all of this.

Feminism is a movement for freedom, equality, choice, love, compassion, respect, solidarity, and education. We may argue, we may disagree, we may struggle to understand the choices and perspectives of others sometimes, but these core beliefs of the movement have never changed, and they never will.

That is why I am a Feminist.

If you feel that you have so far lived your life unaffected by even the mildest form of sexism – anything from feeling uncomfortable when a man catcalls you in the street, to feeling scared walking home alone at night in a secluded area – and are treated with love and respect by every man in your life, then to you I say: I’m glad for you. If you don’t think you need feminism, then that is a victory for the movement. You have fulfilled all those dreams that every suffragette being force-fed in prison and every ‘witch’ burnt at the stake dreamed you would one day.

But perhaps take a second to consider the life of the Pakistani woman who was beaten to death by her own family for marrying a man of her choosing. Or the life of the Indian woman who was raped, beaten, and murdered on a bus by a gang of men. Or the life of the little girl in Niger who was sold to a man more than twice her own age and forced to carry a baby that may kill her to deliver. Do they still need feminism?

And perhaps take a second to consider this too: Even in our liberal, Western world, why do women still only fill 24% of senior management jobs? Why are more women than men domestically abused or even killed every week at the hands of their male partner or ex-partner? Why is there still a pay gap (in the UK specifically) of 15% for women doing the same jobs and working the same hours as men?

And what about on a cultural level? Have you ever noticed how comedy panel shows usually only have one female panellist compared to 4-5 male ones? That almost every dieting product on the market is solely aimed at women? How a lot of newspapers and advertising campaigns will use a sexualised or pornographic image of a woman to sell news or products that have nothing to do with sex?

Or perhaps on a personal level: Do you choose to wear certain clothes because you want to or because you feel ‘unfeminine’ if you don’t? Do you choose to cover yourself up because you want to or because you feel ashamed or intimidated by a man looking at your body? Do you shave your legs and underarm hair because you want to or because you will look ‘ugly’ if you don’t? Did you parents dress you in pink as a baby because they liked the colour or because you were born a girl? Do you want to have children because you want to or because you are a woman?

When you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning, do you see yourself through your own eyes, or through the eyes of the men that will look at you when you walk out the door?

The fact is, like it or not, you still live a world where gender matters. Where gender controls not just the entire course of your life – but the lives of women all over the world. Every second, a child will be born female in a country where she will persecuted for this random biological occurrence for the rest of her life. So before you hold up your anti-Feminist placard proudly and smile at your own sense of empowerment, think not what Feminism can do for you, but what it can do for that one girl. She needs someone to stand up for her. That someone could be you.

[ x ]

(via foxerica)


A Mixtec-Aztec human skull decorated with a polychromic mosaic, tessels of turquoise, hematite, and tumbaga gold sheets, c. 1300-1521 AD. 14.5 cm high.

(via wiccepodge)

It’s Monday Morning…

And here is the weekend recap you weren’t waiting for.

It was a good plan.

I was going to work at the mother ship Friday night, stay caught up, and get out on time so I could come home and get a few hours sleep before we took off for Raleigh.

Instead, all three ICUs were maxed out, I had a freshly diagnosed cancer patient with respiratory issues and bad anxiety (my “good” patient) and a patient who had been steadily going downhill since about 3pm. When I took that patient over, she had a blood sugar of 18. It took 5 amps of D50 to get her up to par. Spent all night trying to get her K+ level down. By 2am her potassium was 8.0, her lactic acid was 25.6, her bicarb was 4.3, and phos was 16. She was on five drips before I even started the bicarb drip. I had already pushed seven amps of bicarb before she came back as 4.3.
When she started having really freaky EKG changes, enough to prompt getting the crash cart ready, I called the son and asked him if he could get someone to drive him to the hospital. He came in, and the doctor talked to him.(Those lab values are incompatible with human life.) He explained that her prognosis was very poor. The son was upset that the MD was telling him that there basically was no hope for his mom. We called the on call chaplain and he came in and visited with the son. I think that helped him some. I talked to him as much as I could to try to explain how quickly her condition had deteriorated.
When the day shift nurse came in, the crash cart was still in the room. She had pacer pads on and the Lifepak 12 was on and running.
Hey, we weren’t taking any chances. At one point, all you could see were T waves. They swallowed up the p’s and the qrs’s.
It took me till 10am to chart. I did all of my documentation after shift change. I can’t believe that lady lived through the night. Went home and got an hour of sleep.

Basically, I found out on Saturday night that if I go a couple of days with only three hours of sleep, I can get pretty giddy without even drinking. Olivia kept asking me, “When was the last time you ate?”

We went out to eat at Tir Na Nog Irish pub, and they had an Irish band playing. One dude was balding on top, but he had a long, lustrous pony tail. My son’s friend Branden told my daughter, Olivia, that he’d give her $10 if she’d go rub her hand on that guy’s pony tail. She’s like, “Challenge accepted!” A few minutes later, the band takes a break, Olivia stands up, tugs on her tiny crop top, and stalks off. The dude is at the bar somewhere behind me, so I can’t see what’s happening. Branden doesn’t help, because he keeps saying, “Oh’ he thinks he’s gonna get some.” She comes back about ten minutes later, and Branden has already taken $10 out of his wallet and put it by her placemat. I asked her what she did, and she said that she just told him that she really liked their music, and asked him about his accent, and if he was from Ireland. We went on to the Johnny Folsom 4 show, and it was great. And I’m not just saying that because it’s my cousin’s band. Afterward, the kids wanted to go dancing, so we looked for a place within walking distance that Olivia could get into.(Some places are 21 and up only, which is stupid.) We ended up going to King’s, which has DJ’s or bands every night, and has a variety of music. We were just “lucky” enough to be there for techno night. It was tremendous fun watching the freaky people dance. I would have felt more “in” if I had been wearing a hoodie, though. Katie told me I was just a little too Breakfast at Tiffany’s to really fit in. There was a girl there who looked just like Lorde and she was doing the Frankenstein. It was fantastic. Sunday was the day for wishing I was dead. I mixed alcohols like a newbie and had the hangover from hell. Now it’s Monday and time to go back to work.



(via mett-inn)


Here are some basics on herd immunity, and here is some more technical research if you’re interested in the details! 

Condensing all of our additional commentary!

From @palavra-valise

Herd immunity is even more important than that, actually. Those three people who are vaccinated when nobody else is could still get the disease (doesn’t necessarily work with protection against zombies themselves so I’m not going with the theme here) because with more unvaccinated people, there are more opportunities for bacteria or viruses to mutate, so the strain included in the vaccine would be too different from the circulating strain for it to offer much, if any, protection. That’s why each and every one of us has a responsibility to keep up our vaccines, for the good of EVERYONE in our society.

Basically, the unvaccinated people in the mostly vaccinated population are safer than the fully vaccinated people in the mostly unvaccinated population. That’s why, if anyone says “Why do you care? You/your kid are/is fully vaccinated,” you should punch that person in the face and then give them a 20-minute lecture about herd immunity and not being a self-absorbed twit and about our responsibility to society unless we choose to live on, idk, an island floating in space.

This is a really good point! 

I should also point out that vaccination is still important even for diseases that don’t show up in the human population a lot any more (or even just the local population), because often those diseases still exist in reservoir species that can transmit the disease, or in human reservoirs in other parts of the globe - which is how we’ve gotten the recent measles outbreaks in unvaccinated kids.

We should also point out (as other people have on this post - you guys are awesome!) that the vaccine-autism link has been repeatedly debunked by sound studiesand that the original paper it was based on has beendisavowed and was deeply scientifically and ethically unsound in the first place.

Also, @madeofpatterns brings up a good point - there’s variation in people’s responses to the flu vaccine in particular, according to the CDC, (just based on age, general health, etc, not the quality of the vaccine) which makes it even more important for a lot of people to get vaccinated, to build up that buffer to protect people who aren’t immune. 

Given that a lot of people are curious about vaccine safety and the vaccine testing process (and some of you have mentioned this - thanks to @randomguy319 !) we’ve got a bunch more information on the vaccine development process and their safety.

Here is a really good overview piece that explains the years of development that go in before a vaccine hits the market, and here and here are more from the CDC with lots of good links.

Both the CDC and the FDA have a TON of information on vaccine safety.

Bottom line: Every vaccine on the market or that will come onto the market goes through years and years of testing before even being tested in humans, and then goes through multiple rounds of testing in humans, before being approved by the FDA and continually checked for product quality and for any instance of side effects. Therefore, vaccines are really very safe. 

Fixed. theme by Andrew McCarthy